What if you NEVER get there?
What if you NEVER get there?
A Journey, Not a Destination
About a year ago, I made a significant change to this newsletter. I realized that I had been focusing on the wrong things, and that’s what led me to a period of burnout. I had spent years trying to be someone I thought the community needed me to be, rather than doing what I’m actually good at – writing interesting things in fun ways and helping people level up.
I had spent years trying to reach an arbitrary goal, and when I didn’t reach it, I felt demoralized and burnt out. I was doing stuff I didn’t like, hoping for an eventual payoff, but it never came. I spent years trying to get there, but I never did.
So, I asked myself the question: what if I never get there? What would I do differently?
The Realization
I realized that I had to change how I spent my time and how I set goals. Instead of doing stuff I didn’t like and hoping for an eventual payoff, I restructured my day around why I started Nerd Fitness in the first place – reading widely about random topics that pique my interest, and then sharing my excited thoughts on those topics with a bunch of nerds (hey, that’s you!).
The Shift
Since then, I’ve written dozens of newsletters about weird topics, hobbies, life, philosophy, and everything in between. 130,000+ people now get this newsletter every week, and it’s only reinforced my decision to stop focusing on the destination and get back to finding ways to enjoy the journey.
The Big Question
I now ask you the same question: what if you never get there? What would you do differently?
The Problem with Weight Loss
Every day, I see people doing exercise they hate, or trying to follow a diet they don’t enjoy, to reach an arbitrary number on the scale that they think will make them happy. Most can’t stick with the diet or workout for more than a few weeks, get demoralized, and give up. Others manage to lose the weight, only to realize seeing a smaller number on their scale didn’t magically solve all of their problems. They decide the daily misery isn’t worth it.
It’s Time to Flip the Script
We’ll never "get there," because "there" isn’t an actual place we can get. It’s a state of mind. This should change how we think about the workout or diet we choose, the goal we design our life around, or the expectation we set for ourselves.
My Goal
My goal with this newsletter, and for our coaching clients, is helping people reach the following realization: finding ways to enjoy exercise, and making dietary changes that don’t feel overwhelming, is the only path forward. Even better, this often results in reaching our goals faster than when we chased fads or strategies we hated!
Acceptance
I’m reminded of this quote from philosopher Sam Harris: "Most of your life is the process of solving problems. It is not, and never will be, a condition of basking in the absence of all problems. There will always be something to do."
Conclusion
What would you do differently if you knew you would never "get there"? What would you change?
FAQs
Q: What do you mean by "never getting there"?
A: I mean that the destination we’re striving for is an illusion. There is no actual place we can get to, and it’s a state of mind.
Q: So, what’s the point of having goals?
A: Goals are important, but they should be a means to an end, not an end in themselves. The process of striving for a goal is what’s important, not the goal itself.
Q: What do you mean by "finding ways to enjoy exercise"?
A: I mean that exercise should be something you look forward to, not something you dread. Find an activity you enjoy, and make it a part of your daily routine.
Q: What about diets? How do you recommend making dietary changes?
A: Make changes that don’t feel overwhelming. Find a diet that you can stick to in the long term, and focus on progress, not perfection.
